High Technology Mexico border barrier

I want you all to know that I´m thinking real hard to solve the illegal immigrant problem.  A few days ago I called  President Trump and offered my services to design his wall, because I´m a tax payer, and his idea isn´t exactly the most cost effective barrier I can think of. I´m really into this because anyone who wastes tax dollars is the enemy of the people. Sure they are. They are the enemy of the people.

(Please applaud)

I start out by telling you that Trump really has no idea of how to build a useful border barrier, when he makes speeches and describes it, he just makes it  up. There're no designs. I don't believe he has even looked at the existing fences built by Bush and Obama.

I watched Trump giving his typical spiel about the huge wall he´s going to build, and how he´s going to make Mexico pay for it, and I thought, "Give me a break, I know how to build a better barrier. One that´s going to create lots of good paying jobs, most of them right inside the USA”.

The people around Trump, they're very dishonest people. In fact, they just don´t know when to tell him his comments are bullshit, and this allows the dishonest media to bash him, because he comes across as an asshole.

So I'm not against Trump, I'm not against the wall as such. But I don´t think the US taxpayer ought to be paying for a tall concrete wall. Something like this:

Trump´s concrete wall, with gravel

 road and patrolling border guard

And I tell ya, I love good stories, but I don't go for Trump´s design at all. A tall concrete wall is just stupid, because it´s fairly easy to put up a ladder against it, climb it, and drop on the other side. 


They can put broken glass, concertina wire, electric fences, or whatever, on top of that thing, and those illegal aliens and dope smugglers will use the wall as a cover to prepare ladders, catapults, cranes, or whatever else they think they´ll need to jump over that sucker.

Instead, I offer you my high technology design. I came up with this after watching several dozen Youtube videos of the existing border fences, interviews with local residents and ranchers, and law enforcement officers who work in the border counties: 

My steel pipe fence design, with 

a narrow gravel road and robot

My design uses a steel tube fence similar to the ones already built. However, my fence design uses used oil country steel pipe. The pipes are cut to allow them to be set in holes, leaving about 10 ft (3 meters) to stick out of the ground. Their sole purpose will be to create a credible barrier to anybody who may have wandered around in Mexico, and doesn´t really want to cross. The pipes will have to be spaced to stop people from sticking their heads in between, which means they ought to be spaced about 6 inches (15 cm) apart.

The key to my barrier system is the self driving robot provided with claws to catch the illegal aliens. I´m not too sure about the robot details. This would be provided by suitable USA robot manufacturers who will be allowed to form joint ventures with Japanese robot makers (we have to take into account that Trump gets along with the Japanese).

The self driving robots can be programmed like the Google self driving cars, but they´ll also have software systems to allow them to identify an illegal alien, grab him/her with its claw, and hold it tight until a self driving paddy wagon arrives and the robot border guard can toss the alien inside. 

USA citizens and legal residents who live close to the border will be recognized as such if they speak good English and give the robot their social security number, and can be released within seconds of being captured.

The way I see it, if Congress approves my design, about 2500 km of barrier can be covered by 15 thousand robots, plus one thousand self driving paddy wagons. These can be serviced by special robot and self driving car service centers spaced about 12 ½ miles apart. That´s 200 high tech service centers! And I bet each service center will create at least 30 high paying robot technician and mechanic jobs. That´s 6000 jobs!.

Just in case, we can add about 8000 additional border guards,  who can come along and help out when the robots run into drug or weapons smugglers and get involved in a shoot out. I´ve given some thought to including a machine gun in the robot´s kit, but that may have to wait until we are sure the software works good enough to the robot doesn´t shoot US citizens or legal residents.

I estimate the total cost of my border barrier system to be about $20 billion USD, but I´m pretty sure the cost savings from not having thousands of ICE agents rounding up illegals, the savings in court costs, and the lower crime will more than make up for the investment.  And there´s the benefit of the robot industry the USA will develop, which will eventually allow robots to be used replacing people all the way from the simplest job all the way to US President. Wow. Imagine that!